Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Normal

Our little boy is just over ten weeks old now, so we thought it was about time we started trying to do some normal things again.

Things you do before having a baby (no, not that thing). Things like going to the pub, or playing a bit of sport. Or eating a meal at the same time as your wife. Or sleeping.

Last night, we did the first of those things. We left The Creature with one set of grandparents and we went to the pub.

Because all our friends have forgotten we exist/what we look like we started organising the trip to the pub forty-eight hours in advance. I sent everyone a picture message of mine and Mrs L's faces, so they'd know who they were meeting, I specified the time and the place and made it abundantly clear that there was every possibility we wouldn't be going at all actually, if The Creature decided to play up.

Still they agreed to come. We're like celebrities, or a passing comet, people can't resist the opportunity to catch a glimpse. That or they just fancied going to the pub and we were giving them a convenient excuse.

Cam was playing the "of course I'm not going to sleep. I know I usually am at this time but I can sense something's different. There's a disturbance in the force and I'm suddenly alert, like Yoda with a whiff of Sith in his nostrils" game. When his handlers for the evening arrived he was in his Moses basket, but far from sleeping.

Well, you know what, we went anyway. I practically had to physically remove Mrs L from the house, but with a little (lot) of helpful reassurance that Cam would, in fact, survive a few hours without us, we left.

We did a quiz. We came second. But that wasn't really the point. It was an evening where we could feel a little bit of what used to be normal to us. Adult company. Stupid jokes and sharing anecdotes. No fear that a tiny person may soon be yelling at us or needing food or a new nappy. Mrs L got a bit drunk on one glass of wine (this is not new, she's a proper lightweight) and I had a few bottles of cider. We both had a nice time. A really nice time.

Wobbly legs juice. Hic.

It hasn't been the easiest of transitions for us. Neither of us had truly realised how much we valued our independence and freedom until Cam came along and essentially robbed us of it. For Mrs L especially, there's been a feeling of captivity, of losing who she is and only being recognisable as a mum. Yesterday, for a few hours, we both managed to shift our focus from Cam and back on to ourselves.

I didn't even feel my usual, trademark, guilt. I knew he'd be fine and he was. In fact, he had a better night than he has in a while and for the majority of today he's been cheerful and smiley.

Perhaps we should go to the pub more often.

The Creature is our "normal" now, but it was amazing to take a trip to a pre-child world, even if it was only for a while, and a complete optical illusion.

16 comments:

  1. Good stuff! I remember the first time we went out sans baby; we went as far as the local Harvester (a five-minute walk) and were back within an hour! Our son was fast asleep and blissfully oblivious that we hadn't been there, of course...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We were less than five minutes away! But we did manage a few hours :-)

      Delete
  2. I feel like I lost my identity for quite a while after I had D although it didn't ever bother me. It was only when he got to about 5/6 months that I was really interested in doing other things and then I (hopefully) became a bit more interesting! Make sure you have plenty of time together as a couple and doing pre-baby things it is really important. x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We're trying, it's not easy though, as you know!

      Delete
  3. Yay for you guys! It was a long time until we went out without Curly Girl and we so should have done it sooner. *High five*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *high five*

      I think it was really good, I'm hoping it will encourage Mrs L to do more :-)

      Delete
  4. I'm glad to hear you managed a few hours away, it can help to rediscover what you did with your life before a little person came into it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was really nice, we'll try to do it again soon!

      Delete
  5. Me and my OH have been out once alone since our first child was born . . . 3 and a half years ago. Its harder to get a babysitter for two babies hehe people aint so keen. Glad you enjoyed it x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh man, I hope you manage to get out again soon! Maybe I could babysit, but oh no, you're anonymous so I can't! ;-)

      Delete
  6. Brilliant - you just feel so recharged don't you? This past weekend we got away for a whole night while the grandparents babysat and completely indulged in a very long lie-in the next morning. It was utter bliss (though of course we did spend some of the evening watching videos of her but hey, we couldn't go completely cold turkey ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ha! It's true, you can't escape completely, we were merrily chatting about him in the pub. It's nice that people are interested :-)

      Delete
  7. When Hex had her puppies earlier this year I had 8 weeks of interrupted sleep, mouths which constantly needed feeding, paper which constantly needed changing, brains which needed stimulating and noise when these needs weren't preempted and met in advance.
    I felt worry leaving the house for anything over 45mins even if I was just down the road and I was leaving the pups with their Mum!
    I always thought I wanted at least one kid...needless to say I have been put off the idea for the time being. You can't sell kids on after 8weeks, they are around for a bit longer!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, you have to wait at least twelve weeks to sell children. The black market is very strict.

      *checks date*

      Not yet...

      Delete
  8. It's quite an exciting feeling isn't it? Like you've bunked off school for the afternoon. It gets better though I can tell you that much. When Matilda turned 1 we went away for a night just the 2 of us in a posh hotel. Was mega and Matilda loved having time with her nan :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is EXACTLY like bunking off school (not that I ever did that, obviously...)

      We're lucky to have both sets of grandparents pretty close to hand, and neither set is fed up of the little guy yet ;-)

      Delete