Wednesday, April 11, 2012

First Night

First Night at home.  Third night in total.

3:40am

He is asleep.  Finally.  She is asleep.  Finally.  I am watching them both sleep and hoping it can last more than the five minutes it already has.  It is the one thing in the world that I want more than anything at this precise moment.

Everything everyone has ever told me about this is true.  I have already felt wracked with guilt for sleeping while she does not, for not having the physical means to feed this tiny person who I am so utterly fascinated by.

Over ten minutes now.  The most sleep my wife has had in over 24 hours.  Her soft snores are music to my ears, with my son's short, tiny breaths adding a second track to the mix.

He looks grumpy even when he's asleep.  He is almost too cute to bear.  It still hasn't all sunk in yet. 

Fifteen minutes.  Thank you little man, not just for doing it, but for proving that you can do it, and for saving your mum's sanity in the process.  Maybe she'll stop hallucinating for a little while now, and have a little respite from the raging headache she's been enduring.

Me, I am the lucky one.  Tonight my prize is watching my two sleeping beauties.  I've also grabbed more sleep already than the other two combined.

4:00am

He's stirring now.  But I feel like I'm already winning.

Disclaimer: typed on a phone, any and all spelling or typing errors are its fault, not my tired brain's.

24 comments:

  1. I love your blog I'm a new mother of a 3 week old (tomorrow) and I can relate to everything you say. I love how much love you show towards your wife and child I am lucky to have a husband that is so involved and he has proven to be an awesome daddy. You're a new dad but I can already tell that you too are going to be an amazing dad. As a mother I can tell you just being there for your wife is enough. :) good luck tonight!!

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    1. Hey there, a bit late, but thanks for reading and commenting :-)

      It's all been good fun so far (well, screaming aside...) and we're both looking forward to the continuing adventure!

      Congratulations on your little one!

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  2. Sleep deprivation is the worst. Don't be afraid to sleep (and let your wife sleep) when he does, including during the day! Best of luck.

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    1. Day and night have pretty much ceased to have any distinction now, sleep happens whenever!

      Thanks for reading, and your very flattering tweet too.

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  3. Congratulations on the birth of your baby boy. I hope you all get some sleep soon. I remember coming home from hospital and and falling asleep sat up mid dinner! It really will get easier soon. Honest :)

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    1. Thanks! We had a better night last night, which was nice. Haven't fallen asleep sat up yet either, so must be doing okay ;)

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  4. Congratulations on your new arrival, I'm a new mum to a 5 month baby girl and can relate to all you say, like you my husband is fantastic , after a traumatic birth I really don't know how I would have coped without him. X

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    1. Thanks for popping by and reading.

      So, five months old, they're quiet by then, right? ;-)

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  5. I had to stay in hospital for 5 days after the birth of my little one and we barely slept. The relief I felt getting home to my amazing OH was incredible. He has been fantastic and a mans participation in looking after a newborn is largely ignored so well done you for highlighting it. All the best to you all, my tip to all new parents is buy a swaddle blanket( tescos sell the grobags version) it makes those short naps last a little longer as they feel all cuddley x

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    1. We have one, it's fantastic! I've worked out how to get him wrapped up well now, my first few attempts were rubbish.

      Thanks for reading :-)

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  6. Ahhh I remember those sleep deprived days well! It's really interesting to hear it from a mans point of view, My OH slept downstairs for weeks, I didn't mind be because he had to go to work the next day but as soon as he was able to help he made up for it! He now does bathtimes and mornings. It's lovely how you are do concerned her :)

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    1. I want Mrs L to enjoy the baby and feel as well as she can despite all the stresses of a newborn, I'm sure your OH felt the same way :-)

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  7. As amazing as this bit is, it's exhausting and emotional and uncharted. It does get easier and more 'level'.

    It seems you are being amazingly supportive and that is the hugely important role you have! Re. The headaches, did Mrs B'blog have an epidural? Could she be dehydrated? I remember in the early days I was soooo thirsty!

    Nic x

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    1. The headache has now subsided, thankfully. Not sure what it was, but maybe a mix of dehydration and tiredness?

      I'm looking forward to level :-) Though last night was more level than the first one.

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  8. Ahhh, I remember it so well. Hang in there!

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    1. We are hanging, not sure that's what you meant though! :-)

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  9. They do learn to sleep eventually I promise. x

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  10. Oh you are brilliant, this is such a good post. I know I've raved on at you about the sleep, but I *promise* you that it gets better. Your son is still adapting from being nocturnal and it will take a few more days for him to get there. The Boy slept from 10pm to 6am from six weeks, your little man will get there.

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    1. Thanks for all your support on Twitter, you and everyone else have been fantastic over there when it's been tough in the real world.

      Fingers crossed for another good night tonight!

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  11. It DOES get better. My youngest starting sleeping through the night when she started school! She was a freak though, the first one was fine.

    Hang on in there - those first few weeks and months feel like they last about ten years, but then suddenly you'll be going to university open days with them and doing that rapid head turning thing and thinking WTF???

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    1. Thanks, we're both a lot more positive today, it was a good night last night and today's been pretty chilled really.

      Cherishing the moments of looking at him and being unable to think anything more than "he's soooooo small" :-)

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  12. Just caught up on your blog, congratulations !!! Sleep deprivation is a bastard, keep your lives as simple as possible until everyone is getting a little more sleep. It gets easier, and what a fun journey you are beginning. It must be good right, Ive done it three times !

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    1. Thank you! Our house looks like I've been left in charge of cleaning and tidying (chaotic) and our diet has gone from healthy to "whatever we can cook in five minutes".

      Keep thinking about people with more than one, madness! ;-)

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