Tuesday, March 27, 2012


I was just watching an episode of Pramface on TV.  I quite like it, it's reasonably entertaining, and has the definite advantage of NOT being Hollyoaks or another repeat of Top Gear.

In this episode the boy who has got a (slightly older) girl pregnant is with her at an antenatal class and is doing a roleplay with the woman running it.  She's pretending to be in labour, he's actually shitting himself.

I laughed when the woman screamed at him: "I never want you to fucking touch me again", among other things.  Then I felt stupid for laughing.  It's probably actually going to be like that, isn't it?  

I've seen plenty of One Born Every Minute too, and most of the women featured clearly aren't in the mood to moderate their vocal output during labour.  I don't blame them.  There's no male equivalent of course, but I don't much fancy the idea of trying to pass a golf ball via my penis.  No.  The thought has made me feel a bit sick.

My wife's a gentle sort though; doesn't get angry with me often, lets me get away with my many indiscretions and is generally understanding of the fact that I'm a bit crap at a lot of stuff.  

So I wonder what my labouring wife want to tell me that has been kept inside through all the time we've been together, will the floodgates open and cover me in a tsunami of criticism, justified or otherwise?  Probably.  

But perhaps not.  I'm sure I'll let you all know once it's happened.


  1. I thought that I might be like that but I was lovely in labour. Honest! I kept telling my husband that I was sorry he had to watch all of it. You never know...

    1. I will cross my fingers and hope that Mrs L is in the same category as you, but be prepared for the likelihood that she isn't! :-)

  2. I think how your wife is in labour may depend on the amount of pain relief she goes for! I was screaming and literally crawling on the floor when I arrived at Southmead maternity reception. I cannot describe the pain I was in. Once I had my epidural I was like a different person:-) Again, good luck! X

    1. She is hoping to keep it minimal, though is also completely open to taking whatever they'll give her if it gets bad!